Forward
Introduction Allowing change & growth The Savior Expectations & conditions Insecurity & low self-esteem Not being realistic Ignoring the problems Sexual intimacy Losing the intimacy Power struggles Over-nurturing Affairs Not your authentic self Freedom of self-expression Fear of loneliness Ownership, property or object… Addiction to a lover Lessons Should you break up? Ending a relationship Spiritual evolving relationships Greater evolved relationships Relationships & Subtle Bodies Conclusion |
In our youth, we may dream of an ideal partner, and while these dreams may fade as we grow older, they never completely disappear. With age comes a different perspective, shaped by society and experiences, often leading us to lower our standards. The fantasy remains, tucked away deep within, while our expectations shift from the ideal.
When choosing a partner, many of us look for qualities that are widely valued: financial stability, independence, a strong sense of character, a good sense of humor, and physical attractiveness. These are the societal norms, the checklist approved by friends and family. Yet, this external ideal rarely captures our personal, unique desires. As the relationship progresses, we might realize our partner doesn’t fully satisfy us. Even if they meet basic expectations, they might fall short of fulfilling deeper, more personal desires. We all have fantasies that seem simple and endearing—traveling together to romantic destinations like Paris or Venice, getting married, buying a home, starting a family, owning pets, and taking weekend walks in the park. When these desires go unmet, it can cause hurt and friction. Forcing a partner to fit our ideal often leads to dissatisfaction. If we ignore these unmet needs and pretend everything is perfect, we start creating a virtual world—a facade of happiness. Over time, this facade can be filled with unrealistic ideas about our partner. Imagining perfection is often easier than confronting and changing reality. Fear of disrupting family ties, breaking promises, losing reputation, or feeling like a failure can keep us stuck in this illusion. Continued wishful thinking prevents real issues from being addressed, leading to friction, fighting, sadness, and hopelessness. Neither partner deserves such negativity. It’s essential to periodically reflect on what we truly want from life and how our relationships help us achieve those goals. Every person we meet has the potential to teach us something—what to do, what not to do, and how to be a better person. Your partner should propel you towards your dreams and fulfillment. This won’t happen if we pretend our dreams are already realized and confuse stagnation with stability. By acknowledging our true desires and addressing relationship issues honestly, we can build stronger, more fulfilling connections. Embrace the journey towards your dreams with a partner who supports and encourages your growth. |