Forward
Introduction Allowing change & growth The Savior Expectations & conditions Insecurity & low self-esteem Not being realistic Ignoring the problems Sexual intimacy Losing the intimacy Power struggles Over-nurturing Affairs Not your authentic self Freedom of self-expression Fear of loneliness Ownership, property or object… Addiction to a lover Lessons Should you break up? Ending a relationship Spiritual evolving relationships Greater evolved relationships Relationships & Subtle Bodies Conclusion |
Insecurities can quickly undermine relationships, yet many of us bring these vulnerabilities into our connections. These insecurities often stem from past negative experiences in relationships or even from our childhood.
Insecurities can cause discord and lead to withdrawal, making it difficult to connect with another person. When we feel uncomfortable with ourselves, we become preoccupied with how our partner perceives us. This self-focus can create a chasm between lovers as significant as infidelity. We might think we’re not good enough or can’t meet our partner’s expectations, fixating on our perceived deficiencies instead of enjoying the relationship. This mindset can lead us to subconsciously manipulate our partner, seeking constant reassurance. We might withhold affection to gauge their concern or distance ourselves, resenting them for not showering us with compliments. In extreme cases, we might even convince ourselves they’re bound to cheat because we feel inadequate. Insecurities can range from feeling unattractive to fearing abandonment, financial instability, or failure in the relationship. These fears can drive us to seek solace in another person or even substances like alcohol and drugs. However, this emptiness can never be filled by someone else or by substances. A partner can support you, but they can’t fill the void caused by low self-esteem. To overcome these fears, you must understand their root causes and work on self-actualization and awareness. Counseling might be necessary if your insecurities are limiting your positive life experiences. Ultimately, you can learn that these insecurities are self-imposed and take responsibility for feeling good about yourself. Ask yourself, are you with your partner because you feel worthless without one? Are you afraid to be alone, even if the relationship is unhealthy? Being alone isn’t the same as being lonely. Aloneness allows for self-evaluation and preparation for what you truly desire in life. It helps you reassess your values and path. When you are focused and grounded, you attract more opportunities. Feeling good about yourself brings more chances for happiness into your life. Your relationship reflects your self-value. You’ll never achieve success in a relationship if you’re unwilling to take risks and be alone for a while if necessary. If you’re experiencing something in a relationship that you dislike, remember that you allow yourself to experience it this way. Reflect on why you’re tolerating these circumstances. Your inner world reflects your outer world. For instance, if your partner is cheating and you stay with them, the problem isn’t just their infidelity—it’s that you allow it. Ask yourself why. Often, we tolerate demoralizing acts due to unrelated fears hindering our progress. Is your self-esteem an issue? Do you feel dependent on your partner’s income? Do you believe you’re not attractive enough to find someone else? These fears are often unfounded. We attract people regardless of our self-image, and they may not see us as negatively as we see ourselves. Fear of not finding happiness with another partner is also unfounded. These fears are based on past experiences projected onto the future, not on present reality. You haven’t met everyone, so there’s always potential for a happier relationship. Only you can hinder yourself from finding love with your fears and actions based on those fears. We create our world with our thoughts. If you block relationships with negative thoughts, you might miss one when it arrives. Give yourself a chance at happiness. By addressing and overcoming your insecurities, you open the door to a healthier, more fulfilling relationship. Focus on self-growth and self-love, and you’ll be better equipped to build a strong, loving partnership. |