Forward
Introduction Allowing change & growth The Savior Expectations & conditions Insecurity & low self-esteem Not being realistic Ignoring the problems Sexual intimacy Losing the intimacy Power struggles Over-nurturing Affairs Not your authentic self Freedom of self-expression Fear of loneliness Ownership, property or object… Addiction to a lover Lessons Should you break up? Ending a relationship Spiritual evolving relationships Greater evolved relationships Relationships & Subtle Bodies Conclusion |
Every individual possesses unique characteristics and qualities that set them apart from everyone else. These traits shape our thinking and provide us with a distinct worldview. All your life experiences are personal because you perceive them through your unique lens. While we share some commonalities, individual evolution is a deeply personal journey. If someone were to examine your evolutionary path, they would only recognize the parts similar to their own, interpreting them through their perspective.
No one’s norms and values are identical to another’s, so you can’t improve yourself by imitating someone else. What is “better” for you is subjective and personal. True growth comes from looking within and becoming more like yourself. Pretending to be someone else hinders self-exploration. The media often portrays an image of perfection, but everyone has their own idea of what makes a person attractive. When you try to attract a mate, you might assume what they find attractive and adjust your behavior accordingly. However, if you behave like someone you think they will find attractive rather than being yourself, you’ll attract someone suitable for your pretended personality, not your true self. This can lead to dissatisfaction in the relationship, as your true self is left unfulfilled. Recognition and support from those close to us are essential. Some people grow up in environments where they must fight for love and attention, leading to low self-esteem. They become accustomed to changing themselves to fit others’ expectations to gain recognition. If you have low self-esteem and love your partner, be cautious not to change yourself excessively to please them. This can slow your inner growth. While you can pretend to be someone else for others, you cannot fool yourself. Over time, you’ll feel a need to return to your true self. Your partner might not recognize the real you if you’ve been hiding behind a facade. If they can’t accept the real you, they were only suitable for the person you pretended to be. One reason your partner is attracted to you is because of who you are—your path, goals, and desires. The attraction isn’t just physical but also includes the lessons you can learn together. As you grow and experience life, your relationships reflect your progress. Pretending to be someone else can erode the genuine attraction your partner felt for you. A loving relationship encourages acceptance of who you are in every way—intellect, interests, hobbies, likes, dislikes, moods, career goals, physical appearance, and personality traits. Your partner should accept your past and present without making you feel humiliated. There should be no part of the relationship that makes you uncomfortable with who you are. Discouraging words that make you wish to change to please your partner are detrimental. When couples come together, they should accept all parts of their partner’s life, not just the parts they like. This includes their partner’s circle of friends, family, work, habits, and pets, even if it can be challenging. Setting healthy boundaries and making mutual agreements in such areas is crucial. Believing that people can change everything you don’t like about them is an illusion. Your partner should help you feel good about yourself and your life because they genuinely want the best for you. However, it’s not anyone’s responsibility to make you happy or feel good about yourself. That comes from finding peace within. A supportive partner will encourage those positive feelings in you if they truly care about you. |